A day in my Posh, Broke, & Bored life / K.L Edition

March 28, 2014
Transparency is a wonderful thing. So is context. My blog posts and Instagram pictures are but mere snippets chosen from days that are mostly mundane. These carefully selected moments are curated to form a gallery of images that alludes to an otherwise photogenic, seemingly picture perfect life when in reality my days are really quite boring. 

My makeshift workstation because my study table is pilled with storage boxes and every surface of my dressing table is cluttered with junk.

Isn't that typical with social media envy? We forget that people post the best parts of their days, say 1% of what happens to them, but whenever we feel down about ourselves we go on Facebook to compare our disappointments against our friends' pictures of their holiday, acquaintances' latest acquisitions, your favourite 'Instagram celebrity''s artfully composed glass of champagne held up high against the city skyline with the sun setting just above it. In reality that last scene was probably the only glass they've allowed themselves to drink all week because they desperately want to lose five kilos, they probably sat around waiting a good ten minutes before the sunset for the right moment to take that photo, and it took about ten snaps to get the right shot, of which they edited furiously with twelve different apps on their phone so that they could post it to Instagram right away and show everyone what a great time, what a great life they're having...instead of just having it and living it there and then, in the moment.

So yes, it's good to put things in context. All that glitters is not gold. I'm not saying it's a furiously polished turd, I'm just saying it might be gold-plated but someone has conveniently failed to mention so.

With that in mind I thought I'd do a post about a day in my life, in its entirety. Without omitting the mundane parts nor seeking to big up the bits for the benefit of an 'audience', not that I even have one. This is me, keeping it real.

This is the Kuala Lumpur edition. Do bear in mind that the car I drive isn't actually mine, it belongs to my mother. I get to have it when I'm in K.L because she's decided that it's much easier to just use the driver and the company car.


Thursday, 27 March 2014

8:00 am

I do my daily morning sit ups, all ten of them. I'd do more but there's only so many times you can hit the snooze button.

9:00 am

Why is there broken glass on the floor? Oh right, I knocked over my bedside table glass of water before I went to sleep. Contemplated wiping it up but then I decided that evaporation will take care of it. Science! 

Wow my eyebrows are itchy. They must be peeling from the eyebrow embroidery (to non-Asians, that's a sort of semi permanent tattoo) I did yesterday. Still, a few day's itchiness is a worthy price to pay for waking up with perfect brows. Better put some cream on them.

I'm painting on my face and styling my hair to last an entire day. I have an event in the morning in Mont Kiara, a lunch in K.L, followed by an interview with Malaysia Tatler for an upcoming feature staring my mum and I, a fashion show at Pavillion, and finally a Stylo Fashion Grand Prix fashion show in the city. I throw some extra shoes, clothes, and accessories together in a bag to leave in the car for changing looks throughout the day.


My hair just doesn't look the way it does when Leo styles it! This is the thing about gaining some standards, once you have tasted perfection you can never settle for less. Sigh. I'll have to make do with what I can.


10:00 am

I leave for Solaris Dutamas, and Shazam at least five songs along the way. In light of the MH370 tragedy, the local radio stations have been much more sedate. Irritating and overly autotuned pop songs have been replaced with ballads and classics. Songs about healing, strength, acceptance, and love. The whole country is in mourning. I usually can't stand local radio (with the exception of BFM, Lite FM, Mix, and my guilty pleasure Kenangan) but I have nothing but admiration for their show of support and sensitivity. 

10:15 am

Why is there so much traffic all over Mont Kiara?! This is taking forever. Contemplate painting my nails in the car and hanging one hand at a time out the window to dry. Decide against it, the pollution will probably kill me. 

10:30 am 

Finally make it to Nathalie's Gourmet Studio for the Hennessy X.O Appreciation Grows 2014 pre event.


Hennessey X.O flew Chef Viet Pham down to Malaysia from America for this year's Hennessy X.O Appreciation Grows 2014 in Danga Bay, Johor Baru. For the pre-event, selected guests were invited to lunch with him. Chef will prepare an amuse bouche featuring a surprise 'Mystery Box' ingredient that we all voted for.


I'm assisting Chef!



I helped made this, it's a prawn and salsa dish...can you guess the surprise ingredient?


With Chef and his assembled band of Avengers.

12:30 pm

I can't stay for food, I have to dash to Shangri-La in K.L for lunch.


I get a phone call "Where are you?" "I'm on the way, I'll be there for one!" "Hello Madam! Lunch is at half twelve!" "Ohhhhhhh." Well I guess I'll be punctual for 'Malaysian time'.

1:00 pm

Where on earth am I?


Where are you taking me, Waze?!

Waze is hit and miss for me. Either it gets me there exactly on time, through clever shortcuts and surprising routes, or it's way off and I drive in a huge circle before ending up right where I started.


The one good thing about leaving my directions to Waze is that sometimes it takes me down scenic routes I would never consider.

It also drains about 40% of my iPhone battery per journey and my crappy car doesn't have a USB charger. Never mind! Powerbank to the rescue. Wait...'device not compatible with iPhone'? I've been using it for years, what's changed? Oh God, it's this cheap knockoff iPhone cable from China I bought for RM10 (£2) isn't it?!

This is why you should never, ever, buy bootlegs made on the cheap in some dubious factory in China. You get what you pay for...and at some point you will pay for your cheapness!

Oh my God if my phone dies on me before lunch I will have officially failed at life.


I see the Twin Towers! I'm getting close.


Ok, back on track.

1:30 pm


I finally make it to Shangri-La. Lunch is at LaFite, and in our usual private dining room.




I get a Whatsapp message from Malaysia Tatler saying that they're going to push the interview to next week, the same day as the photoshoot. Pheeeeew. I haven't had time to look at the questions and now I've been saved. I feel like a kid who didn't study for the test and is dreading going to school only to find that the teacher has taken ill, test has been postponed! I am especially descriptive because of first hand experience, that is the story of my primary education years.


Lunch at LaFite is typically a quiet, discreet, and serene affair. The standards have slipped a little but the food is still good.


Hi mummy!


Polished off two courses (both topped with foie gras that I just can't eat anymore) and cake with this, the most unhealthy fruit salad ever.

2:45 pm

Heading to Starhill Gallery for Datuk Rahmajan Khan's birthday tea. 


Mummy orchestrates a coup of military precision; I am to follow her in the company car to Starhill Gallery. She had someone send my car to Times Square, waiting for me. After tea my driver will send her back to work and then drive me up to my car where someone would wait with my keys, transfer my things from the company car to my car, and then I'll carry on with my day using my car. All of that just so I can keep her company for a fifteen minute journey, but it'll be worth every minute. Time with family is precious and one should cherish every blessed second of it.

That's nothing, when my mum makes plans for the day she'll have a sheet typed up with an itinerary. It'll read something like 10:30 - Driver to pick up, transfer from home to destination. 11:00 - 12:00 - Brunch etc. and at the bottom 'please confirm and revert ASAP' followed by her signature, haha.

3:00 pm



Arrive at Starhill Gallery, one of my favourite places in K.L because of it's close proximity to my usual hangout spots. Walking distance to Sephora, Pavillion, and in the same building as J.W Marriott. Is it just me or has the temperature in K.L risen dramatically in the past year?! What is going on?

Christian Dior hosted a little tea party for Datuk Rahmajan Khan's birthday. 


And closed the boutique  so that we could play dress up, have 'girl time', and eat cakes at our leisure. 

3:30 pm


The Dior Lady limited edition with badges! I persuaded mummy to get this one, but in a larger size because it's more functional. I'm ever so practical.

I have such a sweet and generous mother. She saw me lusting over a weekend bag and sneakily bought it for me! I didn't even realise until the staff asked me how I'd like it wrapped.



I didn't even want it that much! But thank you mummy, you're too nice to me! 

5:00 pm

After the big car switcheroo, I head home to drop off my things and do some work before heading out again for tonight's fashion shows.



My room is a clutter magnet. I need to stop viewing space as something to be filled with things. 


I look at the Malaysia Tatler interview questions, answer as many emails as I can and do some work but somehow two hours isn't enough. I forget to get changed or to touch up my hair, which has unravelled into a limp, frizzy, mess heavy with humidity.

7:00 pm

Head back into the city.

I wonder if I will get arrested for public indecency if I change my dress in the car? My car is technically private property, so I can't get nabbed for indecent exposure can I? I pose this question on Facebook and apparently yes, you can change in your car in possibly full view of the public, just as long as you don't do it near a school. Or a place of religious/spiritual worship. Or outside a police station.

7:30 pm


Oh my God rush hour traffic is the worst. And it's raining. Confirm jam one. Die liao.

Why isn't anything moving?

The traffic lights just don't change and when they do they last about five seconds. Arran and I are whatsapping at red lights (which is 95% of the time) our fury at everything; the traffic, the city, the pedestrians. Our messages gets increasingly incoherent and expletive ridden.

8:00 pm


It's been half an hour and I've only advanced 200 feet?!

Waaaah the pedestrians in K.L DAMN SETAN BETUL. Super kurang ajar can die dot com.

Uncle, cannot see red light ah?! Why you walk right in front of my car, lei yao sei ah?! Come I help you fulfil your wish!

Seriously as it is the traffic only moves once every 2 minutes for a total of five seconds and you pick THAT VERY MOMENT to jaywalk and block my way?

Hello Aunty! Those five seconds it takes for you to drag your fat self across my path could make all the difference between me missing the green light! And it does!

And I hate it when they illegally cross during my green light, walk right across my car and expect me to brake to avoid hitting them, and then they put out their palm to me as if to say stop. So patronising! Please ah, you know you're doing something illegal and you dare to wave your palm about like you're a traffic cop? Summore while strolling and taking their sweet time, if you're going to hold up traffic during rush hour because you just can't wait for my red light then at least have the courtesy to hurry up.

Waaaah damn bedebah sial I really CANNOT!

Arran: "Just bang sajalah!"
Me: "Cannot, kesian my car, nanti ada satu lebam kat logo Mercedes."

8:15 pm


I finally make it to Pavillion. My God sweat until ketiak basah.

No photos of myself because by then I was an angry mess. I was hoping I would go unnoticed and none would spot me but dammit, Nadine spotted me and asked on Instagram 'Is that you I see?' I've been rumbled!

8:30 pm


The first showcase of Pavillion Pitstop kicks off with a performance from the legendary Salamiah Hassan and her daughter Atilia. 

Atilia's petite, slim figure is perfection. She looked amazing and has a gorgeous face and incredible voice to match, good for her! She and her mummy Salamiah are so adorable together! The way she says to her daughter 'Go, baby!' during duets aaaaah it's so cute I can't handle it! I love mother and daughter teams. People think that girls are usually spoilt by their fathers, but in my case it's my mother and I think that makes more sense, no?


Spring/summer collections from Repetto, Diane von Furstenberg, and Karen Millen.


9:00 pm


Taking outfit of the day photos.

Wah ni kan wo de xiao didi de hiao po mesh trousers. Must show off the goodies. Lelong lelong, come and see, mari mari, very nice one!

9:15 pm

"Nana, are you going to Stylo?"
"No wor! No mood."

Arran and I can't decide whether we want to go to Stylo. Is it worth the hassle? I'm not a huge fan of the designers showing today, and the thought of parking in that dirt lot behind Poppy Garden and walking the distance on the high-heel swallowing 'tarmac popcorn' pavement of the city is too much to bear. Damnit, why did Stylo have to be held somewhere without indoor parking or a valet service? Why can't DBKL pave the roads smoothly like in London? Why can't I walk in high heels?


Let's mull it over at Ichiban Boshi.

Bad decision.

Worse Japanese food ever. The salmon is suspiciously pale, like bleached carrots (if there's such a thing), the chuka wakame is limp and uninspired, the chuka idako is rubbery, the sauce thick and gloomy like cheap tinned tomatoes. Even the agedashi tofu is too salty. 

I've decided not to go to Stylo after all. Arran is, he's going to drive past and see if it looks happening and worth his time. Half an hour later I get a text from him "Waaaah got hot ang moh! I'm going in!" Hahahaha oh to be young and to be free.

10:00 pm

I walk to the autopay machine to pay my parking fee and leave when I realise that the only small change I have is a RM5 note. Everything else is in denominations of hundreds and the machines don't take anything over RM20. Oh no all the shops are closed or closing, and none of them are going to break a hundred, don't tell me I have to walk out of Pavillion, look for a 7-11, and walk back to the carpark? In heels?!

Please please please let my parking fee be RM5.

I put in my parking ticket.

I hold my breath.

RM8.

NOOOOOOO!!!!

Luckily the young man and his girlfriend next to me sees my predicament. He comes over and pays the remaining RM3 of my fare.

"Oh my God thank you thank you thank you you just saved me a long walk to 7-11!"
"No problem. My name is Adrix. Here, this is my business card."


And then he says "For a loan please consider RHB!"

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!! Ok I'll open an account and bank in RM3!

I burst out laughing at his smoothness, tell him he's a great walking advertisement and a credit to his bank, and wish him and his girlfriend a good night.

Ahahahaha I cannot, this is just too good.

11:00 pm

I finally get home and tell my mum about the anecdote with walking billboard man.

She says "Oh, I'm having lunch with the chairman (or CEO?) of RHB tomorrow, I'll tell him this story, it'll make him smile!"

Me "Please do, and tell him that Adrix is an asset to the company!"

Mummy took a photo of his card for reference, so Adrix if you get a raise or promotion you know who to send flowers to. Haha!

12:00 am

I chat with people back in London, this is the only time I can catch them because of the time difference and our schedules.

It gets a bit saucy because it's late at night for me, if you know what I mean.

How is it already two in the morning? I have to be up in six hours!

And it starts all over again!

Goodnight cruel world I'll see you in the morning. 

17 comments:

  1. hahahaahahaahaa omg i like the RHB part. so funny!!!! your day seemed to be very busy and not mundane at all! this post is a very enjoyable read.

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  2. 1. No no no that is not a boring day! Even when written down as a spreadsheet.
    2. Your morning sit ups .. LOL
    3. Your hair looked so goood! Why U NO SPILL secret! Is your hair naturally thick and obedient, is that why you get a day long wave and curl? *rage*
    oh, oh I almost forgot, 4. where's the preview of the bag! very temptation, much secret, wow.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My hair is thick but NOT obedient. When tonged, the curls become loose very quickly because my hair is naturally very straight. Notice how the last photo of me was taken at around 3pm? ;(

      Preview of the bag coming soon in it's own post ;) x

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  3. Jasiminne, you are so witty! :-) Loved this post.
    Thanks for sharing the secret to perfect eyebrows! I was in Malaysia last year and I noticed all these beautiful women with their perfect eyebrows! Bought some eyebrow make up in Singapore then, but no one told me that eyebrow embroidery does the trick! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Many beautiful South East Asian women are ALL about artifice; eyebrow embroidery, non-invasive (and invasive for the more hardcore ones) cosmetic surgery, and insane makeup tricks! So go forth and tattoo those brows! x

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  4. "Once you have tasted perfection you can never settle for less. Sigh" haha! love it, so true.

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    Replies
    1. High standards is a burden we all must bear! x

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  5. Solid like! And love your blog. Have your kind of schedule, parents don't have that much money, so still envy you a little. But then I don't know your battles. To summarise: go! Keep doing what you're doing and even better. X

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    Replies
    1. It's so true that everyone has their own battles but few bare their souls about their struggles compared to how many people talk about only the good things that happen to them. Thank you for your kind words :) Keep fighting your fight and be the best you can be! x

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  6. awh i do hope adrix's random act of kindness pays off! this promotes good faith in humanity although people should not expect return with their kindness lol

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  7. Yes, I agree that little acts of random, sincere, kindness is what gives me hope for humanity! x

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  8. this is a boring normal day?? no way…. :) i can't believe it

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    Replies
    1. I wouldn't say 'boring' but yes, it was a fairly standard day! x

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    2. ...except for my encounter with Adrix from RHB! x

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  9. What a read! Enjoyed every bit of it. Was invited to the fashion show at Pavilion and Stylo as well, but couldn't make it for both.

    PS: Any news on Adrix's promotion?

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    Replies
    1. No wor! But the CEO did love the story! x

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